Thoughts by Hannah Michelle

Living in the town I graduated high school from highlights the contrast of what it means to be in your early-20s.   Some of my classmates have one or two kids already, but anytime I’m handed a baby, I still can only hold it until it begins to cry.   Some of them are married, some are not.   Some of my classmates are well into their degree programs, or are stepping into the beginning of their career fields.   Others have been to rehab, some doing better, some continuing to relapse.   Another few make headlines for arrests, one of the few things that are heavily reported on here. And some have moved states away, never to return again. Then there is me.   I thought I knew exactly who I was and what I wanted. I don’t. I’m not really sure who I am or what my purpose is.   And I know this is okay, in the logical part of my head.   But I am twenty-one and almost done with a bachelor’s degree, so it seems pointless to change my ma...

Some of my friends love everything about the beginnings of relationships.   First dates, first kisses, first conversations, getting to know about the other person’s family, beliefs, hobbies, hopes, and dreams. Not me.   I have never really liked first dates.   Honestly, I have only ever had two that weren’t just complete disasters.   I am a bit of an awkward person, and sometimes that just does not translate well into dating.   Being in theatre in high school didn’t exactly give me a plethora of straight guys to hang out with anyway.   And as a person who hates small talk, chatting with a random guy about the weather was never as fun to me as hanging out with my friends when I was younger.   As for first kisses, I’m sorry, but they are always awkward.   Always.   Even if they end up being like the best kisser in the world or something, the first kiss is always awkward.   Maybe this is because I am an awkwar...